gravity

a storm is coming and rains haunt
me like typhoons, from gradual
descent to its sudden surge;
i cannot forget your wrath, how
drenched in rage i am… this
unexplainable jealousy seething
from the floods rise to smother
and engulf me, a wave so caustic
you drown me along with the
silences and pull me towards
your deliberate indifference as
though you yourself are gravity

look at me

if all to forget how unattainable
the sun, i almost surrendered
until the light from your eyes
awakened me as any enlightenment
could stir me in my journey,
treading the frozen path of
loneliness before falling into
this heat, this burn you sear
me with your eyes— i am not
the enemy though i may pose
like one, perhaps a threat to your
heart; i will not suffocate you,
though, at times, i can barely
breath having you stand so close,
unmoved and untouched, as we
exchange the same air and empty
the same carbons into the atmosphere,
where i release my hope you’ll turn
around and look at me

unlatch

must i surrender
knowing how you feel?
indifference from averted eyes,
nevertheless, whose design
draws me in and shuts me
out, immediately, as though
i intrude, accosted vulnerability
without permission; in your
bare vision, whose worried
stare determines to unlatch
from the steady pulse and
strength of security, your
lack thereof; I find (you)
more and more endearing
as i place faith in your
widening roots, ever
your capacious heart

covet you

so shall sound rip you
from the silences,
where my heart interred
the voice i have of you
inside my head

i followed you inside
tunnels, worshipped
you alongside churches
with my hand clasped
around your waist

this confession i make
does not nearly absolve
me, and sin is never far
from me when i want to
covet you for always

loneliness

loneliness is a beast,
a monster i wish would
swallow me, regurgitate
me against a Persian
rug where i can make
a scene like crimes do,
to bear so much loneliness
and splatter it used against
a lavish carpet, a mat
where i cannot wrestle
because i am alone,
mostly, though not in my
dreams where i savour
your company even if
it were just a minute
before we poof into a
galaxy of stars, divided
we are into particles
that comprise the universe
and knowing this i shouldn’t
feel so alone, but I do
because i’m not with you

if there were words

if there were words to summon from these fingers,
the worthy alphabets from hieroglyphs now seem
so distant and foreign…

i crawl inside a cave, dive into the ocean and
follow the beat of this heart into the silence
of the deep where weeds pull me against my will
to hear a voice that is not yours but more godly
than temptation, i could never resist; with a
force so firm it rips across all chords and then
hear nothing but the sound of light pushing through
the water, so singular and clear as eyes after tears…

it drums me up and releases me from the grip of
aged thoughts and slumber… and i wake in your
hold and wished you had dove in with me

unfold

love's hungry poet

i see you through the flicker of light
and it haunts me as your eyes gaze
towards the sky, floating above me,
higher than myself can smoke the
derivatives of your ashes from the
tray beside; when i seek to explore this
territory in and around your heart…
you depart, senseless and indifferent,
leaving me cold without wings to fly
even to reach halfway inside of you,
inside of myself where i seek to liberate,
free myself from the hinges that bind me
to you… i wish it were so easy to unloose
you, but i find in my own dying, i can’t…
i cannot unfold my hands so easily from yours

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